"Our Revolution is Like a Gemstone."

A local resistance leader has submitted the following essay to post. Due to safety concerns, he has requested anonymity.

Hello, my nickname is Apple. You can call me exactly that. I have been in touch with Insight Myanmar for a long time. However, I was going through some depression. So I did not participate actively in their platform. Just recently, I felt like I should try saying something. It may be very controversial. Still, I want you to know.

To introduce myself, I am a logistics officer in a defense force. And I am deeply rooted in the resistance. This means that I know a lot of people in any of our states or divisions. So I can tell you the things they themselves cannot tell you. That is what I want to do.

Our revolution is like a gemstone, you know. It has so many facets of truth. Everyone believes in their own facet. And it is really torturous for us. People, they believe in their own people. Yet they have not realized that they themselves have formed a bias. Just because someone is kind does not mean that they cannot kill you. At times, things happen and you should just accept that.

If you ask me how I have been doing...

Well, I can say that I am alive. That in itself is better off than many others. Still, my life is like a prison imposed by myself. And I have no one else to blame.

My comrades, they say they are doing the revolution for the good of the people. As for me, I am doing it for me alone. That is what I tell myself, that I do the revolution for my own future. After all, I cannot imagine my life under the military regime. It is so bleak to me.

Yet I cannot help but worry for my comrades. They are like a family to me. My little brothers and sisters. So I cannot imagine anything bad happening to them.

Where should I begin...

People say that Mindat started the armed resistance. Although that is certainly the truth, there are also other truths you should know. For instance, you could say that the underground forces in Yangon and Mandalay started the bombing resistance. Likewise, Yinmabin District, Gangaw District, Kalay District, and Tamu District certainly did not lag behind in the armed resistance. So, we should give credit where credit is due.

Yet, I wonder why is it that our history is being rewritten. When the people's defensive war occurred, it was not the people's defense forces alone who fought, you know. The ones at the forefront were the local defense forces and the ethnic defense forces. If you can scroll back and look for news, you will see that be it September 2021 or any earlier, what I told you just now is the truth.

Yet, why is it that you conveniently forget them? The CDFs in Chin State. You tell me that people are donating a lot to them. But why is it that NUG is not allocating them any rifle?

CJDC acquired 100 rifles or so, but that is merely for their mobile force and CDFs barely acquired anything, you know. You can tell me that NUG has no money and that I am merely accusing. But you know what. I know for a fact that the PDFs in the next town acquired much more than what even the CJDC acquired. It is ridiculous we are comparing the weapon acquisition of a state versus a town. Where exactly is the sincerity of that?

This is not something I tell you. Actually, this is something the people in NUG said too. Like me, some people in NUG are frustrated with their own wrongdoings. And it is all such a disappointment.

Likewise, in Karenni State, KNDF is a really exceptional existence. Yet, KNDF alone does not represent the Karenni State. There are so many ethnic defense forces, local defense forces, and even people's defense forces fighting along with them. Why is it again that they too are ignored? Neglected and forgotten?

An ethnic defense force leader laughingly said to me, “If they don't care about us because we are not (related to) EROs, should we become (related to) EROs so that they may recognize us? Or maybe we could all just go back home and let them fight on their own. After all, we have no guns and our people are dying.”

It is even worse in Sagaing and Magway Divisions. The amount of crimes you hear on the news is actually one-thirtieth of what is happening on the ground. These crimes, they are not committed by SAC but rather our own revolution forces.

It is really hard for me to say it. I had a lot of hope for our government, NUG. Although they are certainly people with good integrity. Sometimes, they care too much about their own faces that they cannot do anything effectively on the ground.

For example, Bo Thanmani case in Yinmabin. The evidences of such crimes have been already out in public. But they are afraid of punishing those responsible in fear they cannot control those working under them. Their solution is not really a solution which is just a relocation and repositioning of the perpetrators. There is no real punishment to them. At first, Bo Thanmani was the head of Pakapha and now he is the head of Paapha. So where is the justice in that? Pakapha is the defense body and Paapha is the administration body, both of which are working under NUG.

Moreover, I really feel bad for the local population living in there. Some civilians were beaten for the crimes they didn't commit and some civilians were shot for petty crimes like gambling. It is like they raised a monkey and they cannot control their own monkey. Here, I say monkey because these people do not fight and they just oppress those who are weak. What difference is there between SAC and them? People tell me to not say anything for unity but you know what? We are actually fighting for our own freedom which includes our own freedom of expression. So if we cannot get that in the revolution period. I really cannot imagine the post revolution period.

Not just Yinmabin, there are so many similar cases in Pale, Kani, Salingyi, Wetlet, Myaung, Gangaw, Htilin, Saw, and Pauk that the people fighting on frontline are really tired. Everyone wants to focus on revolution but it is really hard if the NLD parliament members are saying you are not legitimate because you are not with them while they themselves and their relatives (given positions of power) are actually collecting forced levies in the name of tax for NUG! No one knows whether these money reach to NUG but we all see these people buying lands and building houses. So, I really hope those above can come to ground and punish them for what they are. No, I am not saying not every NLD parliament member is bad. There were some who fought in frontline and died. So, we have to give them credit where it is due except they are only a handful.

All in all, I want to say that this revolution leaves so many uncertainties. My brothers and sisters, what they only want is guarantee that they will be able to live in peace in the post-revolution. That is really a difficult thing to achieve since anyone in power can accuse you of anything. Sometimes, I wonder we should lean more towards ethnic revolutionary organizations but you know they too have crime hotspots so I would prefer it if we have a civilian government that is responsible for its people. We do not want people who raise 3 fingers in zoom meeting but actually reject listening to people who voices their own opinion.

“Although we are fighting armed, we are still civilians you know. At times, we wish someone or something could protect us.”

That is all. Thank you so much for letting me express myself.